From my salvation until entering this ministry, there is a complete outline. When I was a child, I attended Sunday school in a denomination. By the time I was fourteen, I lost interest, so I stopped going to Sunday school. I was originally a sinner, saved by grace. At that time, I met a girl who attended a Presbyterian church. Because I liked her, I followed her there, became a Presbyterian, and even became a theology student. In 1955, I met some people who were going to a special meeting. I was living in Detroit at the time, and I said I would go to a certain state because I wanted to go with that girl, and I actually did. One day, that girl didn’t want to be with me anymore and went with someone else, right as that conference started. I felt that since I was there, I should take the meetings seriously. It was then, through a preacher, that I was saved! (The speaker could not remember the preacher, so he said: In the New Jerusalem, I hope to tell him, “When you preached at that conference in 1955, I was saved. Perhaps if someone else had spoken, I wouldn’t have been saved.”) At that time, I believed that when I stood up, my good deeds could not save me. When I said that, the Lord came in. It was a few weeks later that I realized it was the Lord who had come in. I became a different person. The Lord told me, “Ron, I want you to become a minister, just like Paul spoke of in 2 Corinthians.” I agreed and said, “Amen.” I went to study at a university theological seminary, hoping to become a deacon in the Presbyterian church. The following year I was revived, and The Spirit moved me, bringing me into the realm of The Spirit. So, I closed the door to the denomination. It wasn’t rebellion, but I absolutely would not deny what I had received from the Lord. I knew I couldn’t function in the denomination. Once, I was reading Ephesians in Greek. When I reached chapter three, verses nine through eleven, regarding the purpose of God’s eternal plan, and to enlighten all that they may see what the economy of the mystery is, which throughout the ages has been hidden in God, who created all things, in order that now to the rulers and the authorities in the heavenlies the multifarious wisdom of God might be made known through the church, according to the eternal purpose which He made in Christ Jesus our Lord; I didn’t know what that meant. I prayed, asking Christ in His heavenly ministry to have someone tell me what this meant, and I would follow him. After that, my wife and I went to San Francisco, California. I had obtained a copy of The Normal Christian Life. When I finished reading it, I felt all the principles were correct, so we should practice what it said. We were naive, but we were quite genuine; we had to have this practice. Shortly after, I met a brother who met at the church in San Francisco. In that church, he was the third Caucasian. From my speaking, he knew I was reading Brother Nee’s books. He told me about the church in Los Angeles and some literature.
从我得救一直到进入这个职事，有一个完整的纲目。当我还是小孩子的时候，我去参加公会里面的主日学。当我十四岁，我就对这个没有感到兴趣了，所以我就没有再去主日学。我原是一个罪人，借着恩典得救。那时我遇到一个女生，她去长老会聚会，我因着喜欢她就跟着去，成为一个长老教会的人，这也使我成为一个神学生。我在一九五五年的时候，遇见一些人，他们去一个特别的聚会，当时我住在底特律，我说我到一个州，因为我想要跟那个女生一起去，我就真的这样做了。有一天那个女生不想跟我在一起，她就跟另外一个人在一起，而那个特会也开始了。当时我觉得，我既然在这里，我就该认真聚会，那时因着一个传道，我得救了！（讲者已不记得该传道，所以讲者说：在新耶路撒冷，我希望告诉他，当你在一九五五年的特会中讲道，我得救了。也许其他人传的话，我就不会得救。）在那个时候，我相信当我站起来，我所做的好行为没有办法拯救我，当我这样说，主就进来了，在几周之后我才知道是主进来了，我变成另一个人，主告诉我说，Ron，我希望你成为一个职事，就像保罗在林后所讲的。我就同意说，阿们。我就去大学的神学院中读书，希望成为长老教会的一个执事。第二年我得着复兴，那灵感动我，使我进入那灵的范围，所以我就对公会关起门，我不是背叛，但我绝对不会否认我从主所领受的。我知道我没办法在公会尽功用，有一次我用希腊文读以弗所书，当我读到第三章，从九节到十一节，关于神永远计划的目的，并将那历世历代隐藏在创造万有之神里的奥秘有何等的安排，向众人照明，为要借着召会，使诸天界里执政的、掌权的，现今得知神万般的智慧，这是照着祂在我们的主基督耶稣里，所立的永远定旨；我不知道那是什么意思，我就有一个祷告，求基督在祂升天的职事里，使一个人可以告诉我这是什么意思，那我就会跟随他。之后我和妻子就到加州旧金山去，当时拿到了正常的基督徒生活，我读完时，我觉得所有原则都对，所以我们该实行里面所说的。我们很天真，但我们相当真实，我们该有这样的实行，不久之后我遇到一个弟兄，他在旧金山召会聚会，在那个召会中他是第三个白人他从我的说话中知道我在读倪弟兄的书，他就告诉我洛杉矶召会，以及一些文字。
In The Stream magazine, I read an exposition on Ephesians 3, which spoke about the sonship. I had been taught by many theologians, but this man from China was able to teach me this matter. I saw the ground of the church, so I came to the Lord’s recovery because of the truth. He invited me to attend a Lord’s Day meeting in San Francisco, and we became the fourth and fifth Caucasians there.
我在水流报中，读到其中一篇关于以弗所三章的解经，其中说到长子的名分。我给很多的神学家教过，但这个从中国来的人能够教我这件事情，我就看见召会的立场，所以我来到主的恢复乃是因为真理。他邀请我到旧金山参加主日聚会，我们就成为那里第四和第五个白人。
At the conference in New Jersey last year, I also testified there. If this is the proper ground, I am in the house of God. After meeting there for a few weeks, I was led by the Lord to go to Los Angeles for a conference. At that time, Brother Lee was in Taiwan. During the turmoil in Taiwan, that generation was lost, so I didn’t see Brother Lee in person for six months. How to meet? I had no concept, and I didn’t expect everyone to love me; that couldn’t prove it was the church. I wanted to find the true church, not an ideal church. I found a job at a high school. It wasn’t until April 1967 that I saw Brother Lee. When I saw him speak—I didn’t just hear him, I saw him speak—when I gazed at him and listened to him, two words flowed within me: “selfless.” Here was a man speaking without self. I had never seen such a thing. Usually, when we speak, we express ourselves, but here was a ministry expressing Christ, not expressing self. Therefore, I immediately had respect for him, and I had a hope—a hope to follow in his footsteps, a hope to also be selfless. So, I lived the church life in Los Angeles.
去年纽泽西的特会，我也在那里作见证。若这是个正确的立场，我就在神的家里了。在那里聚了几周，我受主引导，来到洛杉矶参加特会。当时李弟兄在台湾，在台湾的那个风波中，那一代都失去了，所以我都没有见到李弟兄本人有六个月之久。要如何聚集？我没有任何观念，我也没有期望每个人都爱我，这不能证明这就是召会，我想要找到真正的召会，而不是一个理想的召会。当时我找到一个高中的工作，直到一九六七年的四月，我才见到李弟兄，当我看见他说话，我不是听见，我是看见他说话，当我注视他、听他说话，有两个字在我里面流，就是无己，有一个人说话没有己。我未曾见过这样的事情，通常我们说话都表现自己，但这里有一个职事，在彰显基督，没有彰显己，因此立刻我对他有一个尊重，因此我就有一个盼望，盼望跟随他的脚踪，盼望也能无己，所以我就在洛杉矶过召会生活。
In 1967, there was a conference and training that spoke about the ministry through the cross, referring to 2 Corinthians and how the ministry is produced. He encouraged us to pray for several messages: “Lord, give me the experience I need, the experience that will produce the ministry.” I prayed with all my heart and my spirit. I didn’t know what I was asking for. From 1967 until 1994, simply put, I lived a hidden life. In 1974, I returned to Anaheim to work with Brother Lee on the Life-studies. He said the Life-studies were a massive work. Brother Lee was about seventy years old at the time. When I began preparing to go to Anaheim, I prayed, “Lord, for the first time in my life, let me do something not for myself.” The service there, working under Brother Lee’s ministry, required that I not use my own words but express things using Brother Lee’s words. I had to enter into his spirit, his burden, his thoughts, his feelings, and his points of emphasis. I worked on the Life-studies for twenty-four years. After that, I went to the office in Irving, Texas, to live a simple and pure church life. The time in Anaheim, the fellowship with Brother Lee, fighting for the truth—the principle was that when the father is attacked and cannot speak, his sons need to speak. If the sons remain silent, it is a shame to the father. I worked in fellowship with him. In 1994, Brother Lee asked me to move from Irving to Anaheim. At that time, a brother didn’t think I had the qualification. After I had been living in Anaheim for a few days, I saw an article saying, “Brother Lee’s high peak truth is against God.” Brother Lee asked, “Brother, do you have a burden to write something?” So Ed, Andrew, and others started writing. Brother Lee also knew that I was not in the flesh but strong in the spirit. From 1994, I sat in the back. At that time, Brother Lee called some co-workers up. I sat next to a co-worker; I was not a co-worker, just a literary worker. Later, I also went up and stood there. It seemed like a test for me. In the past, I was only responsible for literary work. This is not boasting; it was full, full of anointing. Going up that time, there was the anointing, and after that, things changed. Brother Lee and many saints understood. It was like Joseph before Pharaoh, leaving the prison. At that time, some brothers were going to the Philippines to fight the battle, and I went too, with Brother Lee Kwang-hong. He helped me a lot, enabling me to testify to the truth. When I returned to the U.S., I still did literary work, but Brother Lee said, “You must do more.” He wanted me to go to Indonesia. At the Labor Day conference, he said I didn’t need to tell him what I was going to preach on the podium, but I still told him, hoping to speak according to his feeling. I told him what I preached in Indonesia. During the Wednesday night conference, he stopped and asked Ed and me to share something. He didn’t draw lots to pick us; he chose us. In 1996, Brother Lee fell ill. He called me, saying he might not be able to release the message that night, so I had to prepare to release it in his place. He told me, “You need to emphasize reigning in life.” We knew the situation, so we went to Brother Lee’s house. He read the outline, and we recorded it. Ed and I exchanged the recordings to listen.
在一九六七年有一个特会训练，这特会说到借着十字架的职事，是说到关于林后，职事是如何产生，他鼓励我们为着几篇的信息祷告，主，给我我所需要的经历，这样的经历要产生职事。我就用我全心、用我的灵祷告，我不知道我自己在求什么，一直从一九六七年直到一九九四年，简单地说，我活一个隐藏的生命。我在一九七四年回到安那翰，与李弟兄同工作生命读经。他说生命读经是一个很大的工作，那时李弟兄约七十岁。当我开始准备要到安那翰，我祷告，“主，在我一生中，第一次作一件事情不是为我自己。”在那里的服事，就是在李弟兄的职事下工作，必须不用我的话，乃是用李弟兄的话发表出来，我要进到他的灵里，他的负担、思想、感觉以及着重的点上，我在生命读经的工作上二十四年。之后我就到德州欧文的办公室去，过一个简单纯净的召会生活，在安那翰的时间，与李弟兄的交通，为着真理争战，原则就是父亲被攻击，无法说话时，他的儿子们需要说话，若是儿子静默无声就是羞辱父亲。我在与他的交通中工作，在一九九四年，李弟兄叫我从欧文搬到安那翰，那时有一个弟兄不认为我有这样的资格。当我在安那翰住了几天，就看见一篇说到“李弟兄的高峰真理是抵抗神”这样的文章，李弟兄就问，“弟兄，你有没有负担写些什么？”所以Ed、Andrew等人就开始写；李弟兄也知道，我不是在肉体里，乃是在灵里很强。从一九九四年开始，我就坐在后面，当时李弟兄叫一些同工上去，我就坐在一个同工旁边，我并不是一个同工，我只是一个文字工作者。后来我也上去了，我就站在那里，似乎对我是一次测验。已过我只负责文字工作，这没有夸耀，这满了膏油的涂抹。在那次上去，有膏油的涂抹，之后就改变了。李弟兄以及很多圣徒了解，好像约瑟在法老面前，就离开监牢，当时有些弟兄要去菲律宾争战，我也去了，与李光弘弟兄，他很帮助我，使我能够见证真理。当我回到美国，我还是作文字工作，但李弟兄就说，你必须作更多，他要我去印尼，在劳工节特会中，他说我站讲台的内容不需要再告诉他，但我还是说给他听，盼望照着他的感觉来说，告诉他我在印尼我所讲的。在星期三晚上的特会中，他停下来，他叫我和Ed说些东西，他不是抽签抽到我们，但他选择我们。一九九六年李弟兄病了，他打电话给我，说他可能今晚无法释放信息，所以我要预备今晚代替李弟兄释放信息，他告诉我说，“你要强调在生命中作王。”我们知道这样的情形，所以我们到李弟兄家，他读这个纲要，我们就录音起来，Ed和我交换听我们所录的。
I am not trying to say anything; these are just the facts. From 1997, he hoped eight brothers would gather with him three times a week, so we went. We didn’t know how long we would be there or what he wanted to do. We did many different things. Then he announced that he wanted us to write the training outlines. Our lives changed. We knew Brother Lee could no longer continue writing the outlines. When we brought out the first point, Ed and I prepared to see Brother Lee to let him know what we had prepared and have him listen to us speak. That was a turning point. We also made a commitment. We had a solid prayer, a prayer as one man. Afterward, the brothers also spoke, and everyone’s speaking could represent the speaking of us all. We committed that we would supply these things, we would write these things, until we meet the Lord. This was our commitment. At the Memorial Day Conference, Brother Lee couldn’t speak. It was very sudden, not like an official preparation. That was our feeling. It wasn’t the feeling of all the co-workers, but many felt that way.
我不是要说什么，这就是事实，从一九九七年开始，他盼望八个弟兄一周三次跟他一同聚集，所以我们就去了，我们也不知道我们会在那里多久，不知道他要作什么，我们作了很多不同的事，他就宣布说要我们写训练的纲要。我们的生活就改变了，我们知道李弟兄不再能彀再继续写纲要。当我们把第一点出来，我和Ed就预备好要见李弟兄，给他知道我们预备什么，并让他听我们讲，那是一个转折点。我们也作一些承诺，我们有一次扎实的祷告，那个祷告如同一人，之后弟兄们也说一说，每一个人的说话都能够代表我们众人的说话。我们承诺我们会供应这些事，我们会写这些东西，直到我们见主，这就是我们的承诺。李弟兄在国殇节特会不能说话，这很突然，不像是一个官方的预备，我们的感觉是这样，但不是所有同工的感觉，但许多人这样感觉。
There is a picture concerning Brother Nee. Even twenty-five years later, after Brother Nee passed away in 1972, the picture of Brother Nee still existed in Brother Lee’s heart. When Brother Lee was speaking, it was Brother Nee speaking. Therefore, we hope that our service here is a blended service. We hope our speaking is like Brother Lee’s was toward Brother Nee; we hope it is the same. Brother Lee is now in Paradise waiting for the outstanding resurrection, waiting for the rapture of the man-child. His ministry is still here. We have no thought of succession; we are just continuing this ministry. We are not building in parallel; rather, we are building layer upon layer. This is our direction moving forward. A small number of people do not like it. When the ministry shifted to Brother Lee, there was a similar situation. But generally, the churches are walking in the same speaking and ministry. No one can compare with Brother Lee; he is a gift to the age. The blending is for the reality of the Body of Christ, and the reality is for the preparation of the bride to bring in the bridegroom’s return. We do not know when the Lord will come or who else will be raised up, but during this time, we have the ministry of the age, the vision of the age, and we continue this ministry. We are not pirating what others have said. We hope the Body will be built up, the bride will be prepared, and the Lord will return.
有一幅关于倪弟兄的图画，就是二十五年前，一九七二年倪弟兄过世，在李弟兄的心里仍然存在着倪弟兄的图画。当李弟兄在说话时，就是倪弟兄在说话。所以我们希望我们在这里服事，是相调着服事，我们的说话盼望如同李弟兄对倪弟兄一样，所以我们希望也是这样。李弟兄他现在在乐园中等待杰出的复活，等待男孩子的被提，他的职事，仍然在这里。我们没有任何继承的想法，我们只是继续这分职事，我们不是平行地建造，乃是层层相叠的建造，这是我们往前的方向。有少部分的人不喜欢，当这分职事转到李弟兄时也是有相同的情形，但大致上，众召会走在同一个说话和职事里，没有人能彀和李弟兄相比，祂是时代的恩赐，相调乃是为着基督身体的实际，实际是为着预备新妇，带进新郎的再来。我们不知道什么时候主会来，还要兴起什么人，但这段时间，我们有时代的职事，时代的异象，继续这分职事，我们不是盗版人家所说的，我们盼望身体被建造，新妇被预备，主就会回来。
We need to exercise our spirit. Genuine building is in the spirit. But if you want growth in life, Christ must spread into every part of our soul. Only with such spreading is there expression. So if you want to have such an expression, you need to grow and spread; this is the building. Therefore, growth is the increase of Christ within us, causing every part of our soul to grow. When we are in the spirit, praying, singing, and contacting the Lord are no problem. But to do certain things, we must exercise our soul. You use your will to make decisions, and you use your emotion to love. Therefore, if you are one with The Spirit, there are many differences in our souls, and feelings sometimes come from our self. We come from America, and you come from Taiwan; how can we be one? So there are some hindrances. In 1 Corinthians, we need to be joined in soul, practicing the God-ordained way, and practicing what God’s move has entrusted to us. When we serve together, we need to exercise the organs in our soul; otherwise, we will not have one accord. If there is no way to have one accord in the soul, there is no corporate building. We need to rely on The Spirit and pass through the cross so that our outer man is consumed. Therefore, all these things that hinder God’s building must be removed for God’s expression.
我们需要操练灵，真正的建造是在灵里，但是你若要生命的长大，基督就必须扩展到我们魂里每个部分，有这样的扩展，才有彰显，所以你要有这样的彰显，就需要长大扩展，这就是建造。所以长大就是基督在我们里面的增加，使我们在魂里面各部分的长大，当我们在灵里，祷告、唱诗、接触主都没有问题，但为了作一些事情，我们必须运用魂，你作决定要用意志，你爱要用情感，所以你若与那灵是一，在我们魂里有许多的不同，感觉有时候从我们的己来；我们从美国来，你们从台湾来，我们怎能是一呢？所以有些阻碍。在林前我们要同魂，实行神命定之路，实行神行动所托负我们的，我们一同服事时，我们需要运用魂里面的器官，否则我们就没有同心合意。在魂里没有办法同心合意，就没有团体的建造，我们需要凭着那灵、借着十字架，使我们外面的人毁坏。所以这些拦阻神建造的，都要被除去，为着神的彰显。
Our soul is an organ, and God must transform our soul so that we can express Him. If we need to express Him, we must remove the hindrances in our soul. Some people are very strange and have peculiar dispositions. How can this become the four living creatures? This is a kind of suffering for them. It requires dealing and transformation by the cross, removing some of the problems in the soul through the spirit. Brother Lee was from the north, and Brother Nee was from the south, but there was no problem between them because they were willing to deny the self. If we have such problems, we will not have corporate service, the Lord will not gain our souls, and we will not have genuine harmony and oneness. To have the same mind, viewpoint, and goal, the problem is that we do not know the building, we do not know the Body, and we do not know how to deal with ourselves through the cross. So we speak different things, making fellowship very difficult, and we have not yet been genuinely built up for God’s expression. Therefore, we need to ask the Lord to transform our soul, making us one entity to express the one accord, without being occupied by the problems of the soul. God wants to make His home in us. In 1968, there was a strong practice in Taiwan, which was to exercise the spirit. When you touch the Lord in your spirit, God has a way to spread in your soul. Ultimately, we will be one in the divine glory, full of peace, and become the bride.
我们的魂乃是器官，神必须变化我们的魂，使我们彰显祂。我们需要彰显祂，就必须除去我们魂里面的拦阻。有些人很怪异、有奇特的性情，这如何成为四活物呢？这对他们是一种的苦难，这需要借着十字架的对付和变化，在灵中除去一些魂里面的问题。李弟兄来自北方，倪弟兄来自南方，但他们之间没有问题，因为他们乐意否认己。若我们有这样的问题，我们就没有团体的服事，主不得着我们的魂，我们就没有真正的和谐一致。同样的心思、观点和目标，问题在于我们不知道建造，不知道身体，不知道如何借着十字架对付自己，所以我们说不同的东西，这样交通是很困难的，我们还没有真正的建造为着神的彰显。所以需要求主变化我们的魂，使我们成为一个实体，彰显同心合意，但不要被魂的问题所霸占，神要将祂自己安家在我们里面。在一九六八年，在台湾有一个强的操练，就是操练灵，你在灵中摸着主，神就有路在你魂中扩展，至终我们就在神圣的荣耀里是一，满了平安，成为新妇。
The real warfare is in the soul. The enemy wants to occupy our soul, but God wants to gain our soul. This practice of one accord will bring in mutual shepherding, which depends on our soul. Organic shepherding is for the building up of the Body of Christ.
真正的争战乃是在魂里，仇敌要霸占我们的魂，而神要得着我们的魂。这个同心合意的实行，会带进彼此的牧养，在于我们的魂。生机的牧养，乃是为着基督身体的建造。
